Refreshed

This is the second week back for this term, and I have to say that I am still feeling quite good and positive. Not that the break had a lot of refreshment in it, too much negativity and self destruction happening around me for that. But getting back to work has let a few problems be aired, a few more personal steps allowed to have been taken, a couple of admissions/concessions made, and a seeming lessening of the obsession, which has made the internal feeling a lot more positive.

Add in the massage course that I have done which actually gives me a legit reason to touch others, and actually have volunteers to help me with my homework, and my tactile needs are being met in a really fulfilling way. Then also a lot of positive comments have been made regarding the shift from 18 to 14, new clothes help there. And when our new dog comes and joins the family in a couple of days, giving me something else to pour love and affection onto, then things are going to be great.

So, even given the frustration of what others are doing around me, the feeling of not being able to help, the negative self-destruct that seems to be happening at the moment, I am still good.

And I am going to work at staying that way. I cannot be responsible or help those that do not want to help themselves, but I can be good for me. Firstly by trying to take the last statement to heart. And if anyone doesnt like it, there are plenty of short piers for them to take long walks from.