Change of pace

It is strange, I find how little it takes to change an outlook. Nothing has changed overall, but the difference in sitting here now and putting words down as compared to when I tried to do this yesterday is amazing. And what did it take? Just the freedom of being able to do something that I used to be able to do, that situation and lack of knowledge has meant that I have not done in recent times. The ability to just make contact for no other reason than to just make contact. Without any worries of perceived ill feeling. It is the kind of freedom that is sorely missed, and one reason for a lot of negative feeling. Quite possibly due to the fact that available times were more freely advertised in the past. Which leaves me to wonder whether a reduction in contact is desired. Ah, stop it woman.
Yes, I know I am a great one for seeing the worst and reacting to that, and it is something I am really trying to work on, with little success. But I will still keep on trying, hopefully without too much negative effect on those around me. Lucky you (plural) But until I stop putting such a high expectation on the value of my company, I am letting myself in for more of the same old same old.
But I must be getting somewhat better. I can go a whole weekend without having to make contact; Fridays are not the problem they used to be; and I actually can acknowledge the irony behind being a poorer option to the opening of a grocery store. That is wryly amusing. Now.
So I need to give thanks for being allowed to annoy with pestering contact which has gone a long way in breaking my funk. But it is a long tunnel and though there is light there, it is still a way off. So I would not advice that the washing of hair is used to counter an invitation. At least not just yet. Especially if there is any throwable liquid around.